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Desperate for a hand held in daylight, for public affirmation of desire typically expressed only after too many drinks.Desperate to try commitment, then if it wasn’t working, rather than being prematurely cut off from it. I told myself that I was a feminist, despite subjecting myself to unfulfilling, emotionally damaging sexual experiences. *** I had a puppy-love relationship with my high school boyfriend, the kind you see in movies.

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“I had this façade of wanting to hookup with people,” she explained, “but I don’t think that was ever the entire motive …

And the fact that most of these guys wouldn’t even make with me after having sex or would run away from me at a party is one of the most hurtful things I’ve ever felt.” Juliet recalled that, after hooking up with the same guy for three weeks, she heard he’d slept with someone else.

Two students consistently hook up with one another—and typically, only each other—for weeks, months, even I soon came to believe that real relationships were impossible at Midd. It wasn’t just the social pressure that drove me to buy into the commitment-free hookup lifestyle, but my own identity as a feminist.

The idea that sexual liberation is fundamental to female agency dominates progressive media.

At Middlebury, such casual hookups definitely occur.

Far more frequent, however, were pseudo-relationships, the mutant children of meaningless sex and loving partnerships.

I wished that I could be like the guys, who seemed not to care at all.

Months after things had ended between us, Ben said, “I didn’t think of you as a human being while we were hooking up.” Ironically, once we hooking up, we became friends, and he actually developed romantic feelings for me.

I decided to devote my senior thesis to answering the question of whether Middlebury women really were playing the game—and if anyone was actually enjoying it.

*** After interviewing 75 male and female students and analyzing over 300 online surveys, the solidarity was undeniable: 100% of female interviewees and three-quarters of female survey respondents stated a clear preference for committed relationships.

I led a popular student website and was active in the arts and athletics. Your privileged ass has nothing to complain about,” you’re right.

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