Dating a narcissistic personality disorder

“After I travel the world and write my book I’ll sell it to Hollywood, Johnny Depp will play me, then I’ll start my business and consult, giving speeches around the world for six figures…” etc etc etc. – Believes he/she is unique and special and can be understood by and associate with only other unique or high-status people. He is so unique and rare that no one can compete with him and you probably can’t even comprehend half of the amazing thoughts he has in his head.– Requires excessive admiration, adulation, attention and affirmation.

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But they can only keep up this performance for so long, and the more time you spend with them the more you'll find that under the bravado they're surprisingly insecure.

Also worth noting: "There are two types of narcissism: 'grandiose' and 'vulnerable,'" Van der Linden says.

You: “Oh yes, you sounded perfect on the phone with your boss!

You were firm but not overbearing, you flattered him but got in some good points about yourself, I can’t believe how well you handled that.” Repeat x’s 100 or however long it takes for him to stop fishing for compliments and positive analysis. He can complain and whine for hours about all of his problems, real and imagined but when you need to talk about your constantly undermining coworker or sick relative, suddenly he is busy or maybe just returns a blank stare and a “Oh I’m sure it will be fine.” kind of remark.

While considering the narcissistic levels of ourselves or loved ones is not new, a recent Chicago Tribune article about dating narcissists offered some handy tips on how to diagnose and, more importantly, decide to live with (or leave) a narcissist.

The American Psychological Association lists nine core traits of narcissism, but someone only needs five of these to qualify for Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD).

The more difficult line to draw is where expressions of narcissism start to interfere with someone's ability to function in society or to maintain healthy and fruitful relationships with others."Narcissism may be a positive in some circles—it's said that a greater proportion of CEOs have this trait—but one place it definitely hurts is in your love life.

Narcissists are initially perceived as charming and confident, but over the long haul this superficial charm tends to turn into aggressive and domineering behavior, Van der Linden explains.

"But if your partner is bullying you in any way, don't ignore the signs, even if they are charming."They have a long string of short relationships.

It's not unusual these days to have quite a few previous relationships.

This leads them to quickly cycle through friends and romantic partners, always looking for the next person who'll give them the adulation they crave.

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