Dating someone with anorexia

There’s the emotion of body image, and how individuals who are so aware of their figures may feel about someone else seeing them.

(Or just as complex and traumatic can be when someone finds an underweight body attractive, they know they must gain weight, but are responding to these positive comments with disordered thoughts.) But there’s also very clear physiological reasons.

If the body is barely able to look after itself, it cannot support the growth of another being.

Dissatisfaction with the self may lead individuals to believe that they can not be loved anyway, and so not risk the vulnerability that comes with opening up to another person. Friendships will alter as personality and vivacity start to wither as weight does.

Quite apart from the number of social occasions which revolve around food – and no one likes to dine with someone pushing a salad around – people want friends who can engage and interact, rather than those who are obsessive, irritable and lost in their own worlds of the disorder.

I mentioned how I used to find it a comfort to hold my hip bone in bed. Eating disorders have such a fundamental impact upon relationships.

Roughly 60% had never married, 28% had children, 61% were unemployed and 51% reported no social relationship.

Many people with eating disorders struggle with sexual intimacy and a reduction in libido.

There could be many reasons for this, but two stand out.

remember speaking with a group of patients about our body checking rituals. In this study the average participant was 33 years old and had been ill for over 16 years.

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