Online dating hard for men

When I responded that a) There are worse things in life then having dinner with someone who you find unattractive, andb) His friend was at fault for not exchanging photos before meeting up he was totally unconvinced, and more then a tad miffed that i should question his judgement.(Bear in mind that there weren’t even PCs around he was last single) Anyway, my dad’s friend has subsequently met a great woman on the internet with whom he is in a committed relationship.If you choose to wait for lightning to strike until you go on another date with the “right” guy, you might be waiting a long, long time. Listen, you might think I’m nuts to keep on preaching positivity. All I know is that it’s freakin’ HARD to meet someone.

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Dear Geoff, Glad to hear you found someone special, and even happier that you spoke up.

Most of the people that write about online dating write about what’s wrong with it. I mean, that’s what news is – emphasize the bad, misery loves company, etc.

Turn on the TV and it’s not about kittens being saved from trees, but drive-by shootings.

That doesn’t mean there aren’t plenty of kittens saved from trees.

And as you get into your mid-30’s, the bar scene is really old and set-ups have become a bit of a joke. But because it creates opportunity where previously there was none. My best friend in New York is marrying a man she met on e Harmony. My sister’s best friend is in love with a man she met on e Harmony. So as I see it, you have two choices: quit online dating and make a supreme effort to go to as many parties, coffee shops and adult education classes as possible OR try to find a way to avoid the worst of the online daters.

While it’s nice to say, “I want to meet someone organically, where our eyes meet, so I can feel chemistry”, that simply doesn’t happen very often. My first love, in 2003, was a Filipino woman that worked in the pharmaceutical industry and lived in a different part of town. I have dozens of clients who are married, engaged and in love with people they met online. So let’s acknowledge the flaws of online dating: the liars, the bores, the flakes, the crazies, the morons, the perverts, the poor spellers, and so on. The third, and most popular choice, is to quit and wait for your soulmate to drop out of the sky, like “The Secret” for love. Your best bet is to keep dusting yourself off, learning from your mistakes, and staying in the game. But sometimes, with enough perseverence (as well as luck, timing, a good profile and a positive attitude), you’ll fall in love.

What I learned from carrying out an interview of a female and the interview of a male trying to dig into this intriguing subject was that using the Internet for dating is equally painful for men and for women, but for very different reasons.

Ironically enough, if you could take the best of those women and the best of those men, and place them in a big room where they could sit at a table and ask each other questions in person – you’d probably have 4 or 5 new match-ups by the end of the night. All they have to do is get online every day, sitting on their princess throne and file through the dozens or more profiles of men who have messaged them throughout the day.

And if it hasn’t happened to you yet, you can say “What’s wrong with these terrible people on these awful sites?

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